Wonderfully Made – Build Successful Marriages

The awaited sequel of the vampire series – The Twilight Saga: New Moon did not fail to disappoint with their impressive graphics, artistic scenes and.. the love triangle romance of the 3 hottest Hollywood stars of the moment.

After the show, I couldn’t resist my temptation to ask Roxanne, “Who would you choose if you were Bella? The vampire or the werewolf? Edward or Jacob?”

She thought for a moment and replied, “It’s hard, as both are very loving, and sacrificial. They are willing to lay down their lives for Bella and are great protectors and lovers. Both left Bella sacrificially for her good in order not to hurt her.”

I agreed with her observations, but told her I will go for Jacob.

Naturally, she asked why?

Allow me to just turn on my objective switch even though this is just a make believe motion picture which should really be taken with a pinch of salt. If this love triangle would come alive right now in reality, Jacob is the outright choice, the better man to pick of the two.

The logic behind is simple. Jacob is more ’mature’ in his approach to love. While Edward and Bella fell instinctively for each other in Twilight (sequel 1) without knowing much about each other, other than the physical attributes and the feel good mysterious vibes, Jacob has been really consistent in his interest for Bella for a long time. And the best of it all, he enjoyed a great friendship with her! Throughout their friendship, Jacob behaved like the perfect gentleman – he was non-imposing, did not cross the boundaries of a friend, yet deadly consistent and always there for her when she needs him. For someone to exhibit such traits for an extended period of time, it tells you something about his character, and his maturity.

And this is something Edward seemingly lacked. The most obvious giveaway stems from the fact that he tried to kill himself after he thought Bella was dead. The result? He almost got himself, his most beloved Bella and their good friend Alice, killed all at once! Not to mention the further repercussions out of the involvement of the other Cullens and the werewolves. Killing oneself for whatever reason - yes, even for love, is never right and is a sign of emotional insecurity and instability. Such a person is never ready for love. Just ask those who had experiences of girlfriends and boyfriends threatening suicide. It’s a romantic disaster in the making. Maturity is definitely far out in the woods.

So the obvious hands down winner (save for the fact that this mature boy is only 16! but really acts like 26 instead), is werewolf Jacob! *Claps!*

Maturity is one pre-requisite to a strong, sacrificial love. Marriage is not just a moment of declaration of wedding vows, but a lifelong sharing of life, including struggles and woes. There are bound to be challenges, quarrels, disagreements and temptations that can redirect your love if followed. Marriage is definitely not for the fainthearted. In fact, with the recent Tiger Woods affairs, Hugh Hefner (owner of Playboy Magazine) has made this statement - marriage is just a convenience. It’s very nice for raising kids, but the notion that monogamy lasts forever is a wish!

Of course Hugh’s statement wouldn’t stand with men of character. Unless a man is a true man in his character, with self respect for himself and family, and truthfulness for which he means what he says, and unless a man is truly mature in his love, it will be hard for him to stand the test of character and true love, to build a happy marriage.

A relationship based on feelings will never last, as no instinctive lovely dovey feelings can last 24/7 for a lifetime. Only feelings grounded by commitment and decision can, and a mature person will see to that that he means his decision, and he means his commitment.

Be wise. Wait for the right person (upright, mature and secure), and the right time (marriage is the only time one really makes a decision to commit), before you give off yourself  fully (in your emotions and your body) and irreversibly to another.